Trig

 Trig
by me(whatever)
to miku- アルカリ成人

I glance over,
the graph functions resemble a heart beat.
Trigonometry, but its only two,
Sitting alone in their seats.

I need a sine,
my sweet π.
is your calculator in the right mode? 

Radians and Degrees,
it's getting rather hot in here.
If you look at the problem with that angle,
I think I'll throw a tangent.

This is a story where we go in circles,
cooperating sines (cosign),
the range we have is -1 to 1,
my domain is all reals!

Your eyes stretch vertically,
rising and rising in amplitude,
But I've already hit an asymptote. 

Arms in a horizontal shrink,
my head in 360°
the measure of θ still far away,
but this terminal disease is yet a side hobby.

This is a story where we go in circles.

Standing

Standing
by me(whatever)
to Of Monsters and Men- Dirty Paws

some days come short,
some come long.
without realizing where I stood at all,
I must've found where I belong.

the way is hard,
it hurts to care.
the mountains among your heart,
are wondering how you'll fare.

The oceans sing songs,
edging across the border.
To reach you is like knocking,
knocking from the corridor.

Some days I'm here,
some I've disappeared.
the birds have all gone,
returning when the storms are cleared. 

If it was yesterday,
if it was today,
against the deep wood slope,
to be where your mind has strayed.

There's a whisper in the valleys,
where your voice has left a shadow.
When I wander beyond the hills,
I listen and swallow.

If it's today,
If it's tomorrow,
it calls and calls and calls,
answering for your sorrow.

the snow sings songs,
over the peaks above.
The clouds cover the world below,
where everything's dead but love.

Some days come short,
some come long.
Without realizing where I stood,
I must've found where I belong.

Pierrot

Pierrot
by me(whatever)
to Yamai- Tokyo Rock City

Pulling on my monochrome.
today too,
I'll be your ghost.

Black teardrops,
a series of expressions
they know to be faked.

I glance at nothing,
come,
play charades with me.

My hands outline,
exactly what you can't see.

Let me out of this window,
I'm begging you
share my mind.

Puckered in confusion,
a human doll.

Don't ignore me,
give me all of it;
your attention.

I pull on the rope,
climbing and climbing
like Romeo to you.

But you turn away your head.
Oh, how beautiful
concealing these emotions.

I keep bumping into things,
things that don't exist to you.

The chime is ringing,
an unwearable sound
giving me a single color.

I turn my head,
slowly, like clockwork,
watching you walk away.

Black and white,
alone together.

The day is disappearing,
Now I must open the invisible door
still without reaching you. 

Everytime, Trying to Believe

Considering that I don't really want to even write anything at the moment, what am I doing on here? I think it might be a habit, or I'm just unconsciously lying. I don't even have much to talk about. The only thing I think of when I try and write on this blog is poetry. That's why there's so much of that..

I've been listening to the song 'The only Exception' by Paramore. I can relate to it so much that it's scary. There was a point in my life that I did not believe in love at all. It's hard for me to believe that the romance type of love lasts, even if it isn't just an illusion of the mind somehow. ..I dunno. All I know, is that, everything in this life can never stay unchanging. I've never wanted to admit it before, but I hate changes; a lot of them. I hate growing older, and I hate saying goodbye to my childhood. I hate forgetting. When I was a kid, I believed in everything unwaveringly; almost foolishly. I believed in Santa Claus until I was 8. I was sick mentally when I figured out the presents from him were just bought by my mom and put under the tree at the last moment. Every time one of my fantasies break, I'm left feeling sick in my stomach, like some type of shock syndrome. I wonder if I'll be able to adapt to these things more easily later on...I hope so at least.

Whenever I write 'every time', I always want to put it as one word= everytime. Here comes my mistake fetish. Even if I do something like this, if I spell it like this, it's still correct to me, even if it isn't to other people or that stupid spell check. People always want to put things into the categories of right and wrong, to the point that it limits freedom. Why can't I just do things my own way? We've put too many rules on society, hoping that they will run our lives smoother. We depend on limitations to keep ourselves within the lines. We depend on limitations to see how far we've come. We depend on limitations to give ourselves an excuse. We depend on limitations to compare ourselves to others. We depend on limitations to limit. I'm sick of thinking like this. It's all I ever do. Aren't I useful in anything?

I look at couples. I look at my grandparents, and I think, "Is that what true love looks like?" But somehow I look at them, and I doubt. I don't think I would ever want to be in their position.

Can I even being considered human anymore? To not know what love is anymore.. I knew when I was a kid. I was so funny, and whenever I think of it I get embarrassed. There was one time a million years ago when I gave myself this project; that while my sister was away for one week I would give her a thousand letters telling her how much I loved her. I pretty much succeeded, and there were piles by the time she got back. I included my little brothers in the project too. It's been a few years, and I just barely got some of them back from my sister who was doing a little light cleaning. They are incredibly hilarious and embarrassing, to say the least. But when I look at them, I somehow feel happy. Massed produced copies of love telling letters that I hardly cared for then, yet they are so precious now, and irreplaceable. What does time do to things and people?

I wonder if I'll come up with an answer. Or, rather, my answer.
It's either that, or loneliness forever.
I can say,
I'm
sick
of
that.

Argh.
I'm bored today.
Can't think.
On my way to believing?
I wonder.
I hope so.
I want to be...

Well, either way, I have come further than I started out. I have people I care for.

Aurora

Aurora
by me(whatever)

I have become a single light,
perplexed to stay alone,
in this wide, wide world
with no hope still alive,
floating on with no end in sight.

Fluorescent green on the edges,
only hides my colors for you.
With no eyes to see my soul,
I'm left with a name like the sunrise.

My existence echoes lonely in the night,
singing a low voiced song.
With only enough warmth for dreamers to share,
I'm stripped of particles.

Moving within this being,
are a million strings all pulling at once.
How can I tell you?
How can I keep hidden?
With nowhere to go,
I hide in my gravitation,
only waiting for the sun
to hide me again.

If I could Become the Rain

If I could Become the Rain
by me(whatever)

I love the rain.
When it falls,
I listen to the melody.
The clouds stop by,
and shed their grace on every surface
the sidewalk, the newspaper stand, the spinning umbrella's,
the leaves of acceptance, and dripping down, gently,
on your face.

If I could become the rain,
perhaps I could meet you again
caressing your cheek as you look up with those
beautiful eyes
Would you listen to my song?
My voice is distanced,
but can it reach your ears?
Please......

In diagonal lines,
rushing down like running silver
I know you love vibrant color,
but will you enjoy my gray?
This is my own selfish wish, but
Please don't just wait for the sun

I don't mind
if you avoid my puddles,
I don't mind.
If I fade away with this brief time,
If you avoid my cold touch,
If the umbrella's stop spinning,
I only want
to cover the world
In my affection for you.

So,
it's okay
if you only want me to pass away,
But, if you want,
I am there for you to sing and dance.
I will dance with you,
I will sing for you
With the streaks of light peeping through,
your figure illuminates with the sky
My only wish,
My only hope,
If my voice will reach you;
I love you. 

 

Princess of the Next Life Soon After

Princess of the next Life soon After
by Me(whatever)
Birdy the Mighty: Decode(Ost) Main theme- Side Birdy-

Melancholic Jazz plays as my theme
This is the Revolution of a Girl!
Shatter salt into the Night sky
Move with the power of Love
to the next Life soon after

Become your own Hero,
The Princess was never Saved!
She is the Knight herself
Covered in teary scars and blood
to the next Life soon after

Running like the billowy wind,
The Darkness will hide me!
She screams and holds out in Kindness
The Dragon was defeated
to the next Life soon after

You are the only person in the world
This is my Sky Call!
Powerful beyond Belief
The Feelings were covered
to the next Life soon after

Shallow Tea-cup Sea
Her Beacon of Flight!
Never was such a Glittery Story
Turned into a Heart of Gold

to the next Life soon after?

Love is a Bird

 Love is a bird.

It flaps and soars in its feathers,
reaching far above our heads
outstretching boundaries
yet it shies away
if you try to touch it

And

Love is an eagle,
catching prey with it's claws,
Ruthless and majestic, a national symbol
Even higher in the air drafts,
fanatic photographers click as rapidly as they can
for the rare specimen

Love is a sparrow,
Small and unconcerning
littering the ground

Love is a vulture,
Devouring what is left across
on the road of death 
a Survivor beneath a boiling sun
circling above in desperation

Love is a Mockingbird,
Singing to the full moon, early horizon
the mimicry
But if it doesn't sing,
remember the interchangeable diamond ring"

Love is a Cactus Wren,
Curiosity of the unknown,
and the same home

Love is a Blue Jay,
Bold and inventive
the sound of the alarm

Love is a Woodpecker,
Constantly barging into your head
for a nest

Love is a Hummingbird,
Hovering for nectar

Love is an Owl,
Turning your head 180 degrees,
below the moon, silent wings
will capture you unprepared

Love is a parrot,
Repeating to you,
what you already know

Love is a Seagull,
Preying on the
everyday swimmers

Love is a pelican,
Holding in its mouth
Words you do and do not want to hear

Love is a Flamingo,
femininely pink,
Plastics standing on one leg
in the fresh-cut grass

Love is a penguin,
Surviving in the Freezing
Flying beneath the Sea

Love is a Goose,
trumpeting loudly

Love is a Duck,
Floating listlessly

Love is a Chicken,
Shivering for safety
to lay some eggs

Love is a Peacock,
attracting attention
with it's shimmering colors

Love is a Quail,
always in the family
with its bobbing head,
on the outlook

Love is an Ostrich,
Large in size,
yet can be indespensibly
cruel and small-minded

Love is a Kiwi,
plumage already full
when out of the shell

Love is a Starling,
pushing others out of
their comfortable homes

Love is a Crow,
Searching through the after-math

Love is a Raven,
an omen of death

Love is a Bird-of-Paradise,
confessing an elaborate display
Desperate behind the mask

Love is a Dove,
a green fern in its beak
reigning peace
throughout for land

Love is a Swan,
necks in elegant arches
white amongst blue
bowing their heads
before the clouds

For

Love is a Bird.

Whoever able to catch it,
lying bait all over the mauve soil,
will put them in a cage,
either sold or kept,
Will it be the same?

Or if the eye sights the color,                                        Or do they wish for Freedom? 

Can anything fail beneath their gaze?                           Trying their best to open the door            Pushed violently back by the ferocious wind                            "Escape"

The answer lies in Eden.                                                who is the one behind bars?

Lies can haunt the air                                                     To set free

however my dreams, but they still fly constant

It does not fail,                                                                Does Love dream,

For only wings can brace it.                                           in technicolor hues?

I wish for Sky.                                                                 For I know I wish for Blue.

*By Me(Whatever)

Waltz of The Moon

Agh, I'm obsessed with this video and song. It's just too beautiful. It actually reminds me of a drawing I did once. I love things like this. It's a bit like Alice in Wonderland, but not quite. By the way, it looks a lot cooler in full-screen.

This song is Tsuki no Waltz by Mio Isayama (Tsuki no Waltz means Waltz of the Moon) I also like all the covers people have done, especially noting Chase's :Tsuki no Waltz (Chase) listen to it to, if you have time and like the song like I do.

I listen to this song while I write my horror story.(I'll put it up when I'm finished) It's wonderful.

I smell all the smoke from the fireworks. All that pollution.

Sky Life Serenade's

Sky

There is no place I am in. The place is always there. Instead of a place I look back to with hurt for having to leave, I instead am always there. There is only me, yet three of me. One is here. One is somewhere else I have yet to reach, and one is far behind. There are no beginnings except for the ones I choose. There is never an end. Here I am truly free, yet bounded firm. Here is the truth of everything, but not all of it. The small dots of hope are shining out. Forever and ever, distant and near. Above I am one with everything. Again.

1/27/12 Fri. Simple Life

I am still here,

covered by many scars,

however, I'm here,

gazing at a star.

Do you believe me?

I am alive,

Still with an end, but,

my fingers are five.

(Today) Love Letters of Life

If I am gone tomorrow,

would you still remain?

In these letters, long ago,

words were soaked in rain.

My irrelevant alarm clock,

wakes me from a dream about you.

Even my unconscious can't forget,

all that lovey-dovey goo.

Let's go for a walk!,

out into the city with a dog.

I need to get this stress released,

Before I seep into this fog.

Hey, If you were gone today,

would I still remain?

That beautiful laughter-like sunshine,

and light that won't refrain.

Life is always like this,

with places where more people are,

I feel normally blue-like bored,

and step into a universe somewhere far.

Why am I writing you again?

I have no reason, but I can't stop,

Not yet, and maybe never,

until my hand goes flop.

* "Love Letter's of Life" Written to Suga Shikao's August Serenade. (It's also in my playlist #40)

* Photo's from Google

* The sky image write was for a Creative writing class, but I liked it, so I posted it.

* All writing by me.

Only to Find You

 *written to this song: Heartstrings ost- What do you want me to do. Watch the drama if you have a chance. This poem is about me and the person I have never met.

Only to Find You
 by me 1/15/12

Here is my pen,
Here is my heart.
keeping me awake,
I never want to part.

I don't know you,
But I will know you someday.
Stirring in my sleep,
I remember what you say.

I guess I always knew,
that you're made of imagination.
Only mine,
Waiting at a lonely station.

I will find you,
These letters I've always written.
Will they reach you so far away?
My hope is bitten.

I will go on living,
only to love you.
And if  I can't find you,
I will search until I do.